James' Story

So we left our house Tuesday night around 7:30 to go eat and drop off Isabelle before we had to check at the hospital. We went to IHOP where I couldn’t eat very much since the baby had decided to spend his last few hours on top of my stomach, making it impossible to eat more than half of my sandwich (so sad). After dinner we took Isabelle to Tammy’s house and were very happy to see her totally relaxed and enjoying the whole situation. I had been telling her she was going to sleep over and by the time we got there she was very excited and kept saying; “Sleepover a Tammy’s YAY!” So we hung out chatting for a bit and finally left Isabelle, who didn’t seem to care that we were leaving at all, and headed back up to Denton. We pulled into the parking lot at just past 10pm and slowly made our way up to maternity. I had been dragging my heels and suggesting that we just don’t show up…I asked Patrick if he thought they’d call to see where we were and he said no. This made me a little miffed…what if we were in an accident? But I can understand that the staff at the hospital is not going to check and make sure everyone scheduled to come in actually shows up. So we made it up to the labor and delivery desk, me feeling stupid the entire way….what were we doing at the hospital anyway? It’s not like I was in labor…I kept thinking everyone would look at us weird as we come strolling up to the desk to have a baby rather then hunched over in pain. But they just asked for my name, checked me off a list and led me straight to a room…the same room we were in the first time we checked in to have Isabelle (before they sent me home). They don’t have that many rooms, so I guess that wasn’t too weird, but it still seemed funny to me. It was also strange because it was a mirror set-up of the room where we actually delivered, so everything seemed backwards to me from the way I remembered.
So I get changed and they hook me up to monitor me for a bit. First they have to check my cervix, which is still very far back and only a ‘loose’ one. They inform me that I’m actually having contractions about every ten minutes or so, but they’re very mild…I thought that was nice as it seemed to mean I would have been there soon on my own anyway. So the nurse, Nicole, tells me that they’ll insert a pill thing right up next to my cervix that will help it ripen. She says they can insert one every four hours, up to four times and then they’ll have to start me on pitocin. She says that she doubts I’ll need more then one or two of the inserts since I’m so far along. So she sticks it up there and Patrick and I settle in to watch an episode of the TV show Bones on the laptop that we brought. After the show we decide to sleep. I woke up to use the facilities once or twice and noticed that the contractions were picking up. By 2:30 they were every two red lines (…this was confusing ‘cuz the monitor seemed to be recording them differently then I remembered so it was hard to understand times and such) and were hurting. Not to the point that I was squirming or anything, but they did hurt. So when the nurse came in to check me a little after 3am I informed her of this. She had told me to let her know when I noticed a ‘difference’ in them….whether they hurt more or were more regular or what. She knew I wanted an epidural, but I couldn’t get one until I was dilated to at least a four, so she said there was another drug called Nuvane(?) I could have until I was dilated enough to get the epidural. So I told her they hurt and she monitored me for another twenty minutes before getting my drugs. She said (I think…or maybe I figured this out later?) that since they were progressing so well I didn’t need another insert. So at 3:30 she gave me the shot of Nuvane…two minutes later I felt it kick in as my insides were suddenly jittery and my lips seemed to go numb. She kept telling me I needed to close my eyes and relax to let it work. So I did…apparently this drug is a narcotic similar to the Ambien they gave me last time. It didn’t really seem to do anything for the pain…what it did was cause me to fall instantly asleep (quite unwillingly most times) the second a contraction stopped….I was dreaming in cartoons and all sorts of weird things… around 5am (I think, I managed to make myself stay awake long enough to see the clock across the room) the contractions were really hurting. The nurse came in to check on me…I noticed because my moaning kept making me more alert. Sidenote: I do not moan dramatically when I am in pain…especially where people can hear me. I may do it if only Patrick is there, but no where else. The drugs made it very hard for me to consciously control the way I was handling the pain of the contractions. I did not like this at all. I think if I hadn’t been drugged up it wouldn’t have been so bad. Moving on.

It was at this point when I asked when I could get an epidural and she told me of the 4 centimeters thing. She offered to check but I said to just forget it since I was sure I hadn’t progressed that far (I didn’t say this as eloquently as that since I was, as I said, totally drugged up and out of it…I now wish I would have let her check me at that point). So she left. The next two hours are a blur of pain to me…I remember being in complete agony when the contractions came and being sure that there must be something they could do to fix it. I wanted to ask the nurse to check me and make sure I was okay, I wanted to ask if there was anything they could give me to counteract the stupid Nuvane, I wanted Patrick to come over and check on me and I wanted, oh so desperately wanted, an epidural. The problem was that with the drugs in my system I would instantly fall asleep once the contraction ended…oh I would dream that I called to Patrick (well I think I may have for real once or twice, but he didn’t hear me) and I would dream that I talked to the nurse, but then I would wake up and realize that it was just a dream. The drugs made it so I couldn’t look at the clock/monitor to gauge how long the contractions were lasting (to give me an idea of when it would stop) or to see how close they were. When I was in the grips of a contraction and semi-lucid I was unable move at all, much less speak and felt that if I made any sort of major motion I would throw up. By 7am I was feeling a tremendous amount of pressure in my nether regions with each contraction and I was sure that the baby was going to come out on its own if I didn’t call someone. I finally managed to fight pass the drugs and push the nurse call button on the bed. When they came on I asked if someone could come and check me please. In came my new nurse (shrift change) who was nine months pregnant herself (I found out later, she wasn’t that big) and said cheerily; “Is it time?” I managed to gasp out; “I want an epidural!” So she came over to check me and exclaimed that I was at a seven and she’d call the anesthesiologist right away. I collapsed with relief (very momentarily) and Patrick woke up and came to see how I was doing. I was unable to talk to him at all…or the nurse really…until I realized that the effort of calling and moving onto my back to be examined had pushed me over the edge and I was going to puke. I said; “I’m going to throw up!” and they got me a bag. A contraction or two later I puked and lost control of my bladder all at the same time…wonderful fun that! ;)
So now I’m curled up on my side with a death grip on the railing and another barf bag clutched in my hand. I very rarely opened my eyes (again stupid drugs) and was only really conscious for each contraction. Inside I was totally freaking out not only from the lack of control the drugs had given me, but also from the utter certainty that the anesthesiologist would not get there in time and I would have to deliver without drugs. If I had planned on this eventuality and had nine months to prepare myself with pain techniques or whatever it wouldn’t have been so bad. But I was scared to death that I’d have to push him out all on my own with no preparation at all. My doctor came in at one point and tried to talk to me…she said; “How are you doing?” and I managed to shake my head slightly. Then she asked; “Just waiting for your epidural?” and I nodded just as slightly. She then left to go to a meeting and said to call her when it was time. Finally, finally a freaking hour and a half later, the epidural guy came. After a huge ordeal (for me with my contractions, drugs, and pulled leg muscles) to get me on the side of the bed and curled over a pillow, the doctor kept trying to ask me questions; how tall are you? I could whisper out 5’6, but the nurse had to tell him…he asked me something else too, but I don’t remember. Anyway, so I’m bent over the pillow and he’s saying things like; oh it’s going to be cold….you’re going to feel some scratching…there will be some pressure, here it comes…watch your hair, I don’t want to get it in the tape…. In my head I was screaming at him to get on with it, but couldn’t say anything for real. The nurse finally informed him that she didn’t think I cared much at this point and I managed to nod in agreement. So he finally gets it in and I lay back. A few minutes later the pain in my back is nearly gone, but I can still feel the pressure with every contraction. However I can talk at this point and they said it was normal and that may not go away. I asked how long before the Nuvane was out of my system (it’s now about 8:30/9am) and the nurse said it should be almost gone at this point. Patrick comes back in and I manage to get some rest.
About 10am the nurse comes back in to check me and says we’re ready to go and she’ll call Caren to come back over. I think the drugs were mostly gone at this point and I was feeling much better despite the pressure. Just before Caren comes in the nurse asks if it’s okay for some highschool students to come in and observe the birth. I thought this was weird, but she said I could say no if I wanted. I asked if they were boys or girls and she said they were both girls so I said they could. Finally Caren shows up and I start pushing at 10:20. Pushing wasn’t much fun since the epidural only worked well on my right side. Up to this point I had been lying on my left to let gravity help the drugs work over there, but was now on my back. This meant that I was slowly but surely getting the feeling back in my left side…not fun. So I pushed and pushed….at the end it hurt to push (not that bad compared to before, but I still felt cheated since I shouldn’t feel any pain with my epidural) but I did anyway. The baby came out at 10:50 am. When he did I felt an enormous release of pressure from my stomach that I hadn’t realized I had been feeling for months by this point. The placenta came out a minute later and I again felt a release of pressure. I thought that was interesting since I didn’t even notice the placenta come out last time. Anyway, so they took the baby to be cleaned (per my instruction, I don’t want icky baby on my stomach fresh out of the womb…) and weighed. I was a little concerned since he didn’t cry right away, but it was okay after a second. He had (and still does kind of) a deep growly kind of cry that the nurses all thought was cute. They took him over to be weighed and informed me that he was 9lbs, 10.7 oz. To which I exclaimed; ‘Freak’n A!” Everyone thought this was hilarious…’cuz normal people don’t say stuff like that I guess…just us Mormons from Utah. So Caren sews me up and is concerned I won’t be able to urinate because of the location of the tear ( I could, it was fine). They bring the baby over and tell me I should try to nurse him in the next hour or so. Then they all leave.
So I nursed the baby…they came back in and were so impressed that he could breastfeed already. This confused me since they were the ones that told me to do it. Why would they tell me to if they didn’t think he could? Anyway, they took him to be checked out and Patrick left to go run some errands. The nurse wanted me to be able to use the restroom before moving rooms, which meant waiting for the epidural to wear off. Finally around 2pm she decided to just stick in a catheter and empty my bladder. After that I was wheeled off to my room for recovery. A bit later…quite a bit later actually…I was getting concerned since the last time I was there the nurses had been very strict about the fact that I HAD to feed the baby AT LEAST every three hours. By the time she brought him to me it had been 4 ½ hours since his last feeding, so I thought that was weird. She told me I could have the baby with me the whole time except at shift change when they needed all the babies in the nursery to be checked. She also said that they had changed the rule about having to be awake if the baby was in the room. I thought that was great since it was a stupid and unrealistic rule, she agreed. So she left me with the baby and I fed him again then hung out for awhile until Patrick came back…around 7:30pm… My friend Margie came to visit at about 7:15, which was nice. Patrick had called to let me know Isabelle was doing well and that Tammy had offered to watch her another night for us. I thought that was wonderful since I had changed my mind about Patrick not having to stay over with me and really wanted him there that night. He stayed over, we had food and watched a show…the next day he left early to work on getting the furnace all hooked up at home. I spent the whole day by myself unsure about when I was checking out, which the nurses kept asking. They also kept reassuring me that I didn’t HAVE to check out, but I needed to let them know if I was staying. Finally around 7 Patrick and Tammy came. Isabelle did really well at Tammy’s house and didn’t even seem to miss us. She thought the baby was cool, but didn’t care much about us. I got dressed and we checked out, getting home a little after 8pm…about six hours later then I was thinking we’d be coming home, but oh well. Patrick had managed to get everything set up with the furnace so we were able to have heat last night, which was nice.
So in conclusion, I didn't mind being induced...well I still would rather go into labor myself any day, but it wasn't that bad. However, I really, really hated the drugs they gave me and next time I will just tough out the contractions until I can get my epidural. That way I can at least know when they are coming and can watch the clock knowing when they will end rather than feeling totally out of control. The End.

Big Night

So tonight's the night. Despite all of my efforts in walking and unnecessary bending over and cleaning things, I have not gone into labor yet and will be checking in tonight at 10pm to be induced. I'm hoping that it's not too traumatic. I'm trying to psych myself up by saying that it will be just like last time, only without the three days of labor preceding when we checked into the hospital. So that's a good thing right? I was also toying with the idea of just not showing up, but then when I do finally go into labor, who knows if my doctor can be there or not. This way I at least know that she should be the one to deliver me, so that's a comfort. After several babysitter sickness crises, we're back to our original sitter for Isabelle. I'm hoping Isabelle has fun sleeping over at her cousins house and doesn't cry hysterically for two hours when they put her to bed....like she kind of did when we visited my sister and she was alone in a strange place. I also hope she doesn't randomly aquire a dog allergy while there and get sick. She hasn't shown any inclination to do so before this so I doubt that will happen. So yeah, I guess we're having a baby tomorrow. That seems so wierd. I've felt really detached from this whole pregnancy, as if it's all just pretend. I was thinking maybe it was because I had Isabelle to take care of everyday and so I wasn't thinking too much about the new baby. But now I'm thinking maybe I felt this way about Isabelle too...like she was just an abstract idea of a person until after she was born. I'm hoping this baby becomes much more real after he's born so I don't treat him differently or anything. I don't know about boy babies....babies are girls in my head...although I'm told they're just like girl babies, only they can pee farther, so we'll see. Okay well next update will have pictures and hopefully a good story to go with them. Wish me luck!

Pocket Rosies...

The other day Isabelle randomly came up to me and started asking for "pocket rosies," I finally figured out she meant she wanted to play Ring Around the Rosies. We had never done this before, so I'm assuming she learned it in nursery at church. Anyway, she's an old pro now, as evidenced by this video. :)

No baby news to report. I'm going in for a non-stress test tomorrow (40 wks) to make sure the 'fetus is still thriving' and then they're going to schedule me to be induced sometime next week. I'm guessing Wednesday as I'll be 41 weeks then, but it could depend on when my doctor is on call, so who knows. I'm hoping the stinker will just come out by himself and not try to be a month late like his daddy was. ;)

Baby Dreams

I had a dream last night that I ran into my old friend Eden. She was hanging out at my house (which was my parents house) and we were supposed to be recording Gilmore Girls (which was actually Charmed) for her mom while she and her sister were out. It was a new season where at the end the sisters all merge into one person. We agreed that the ending where they all got married and had careers and kids was better. Anyway, the baby started kicking and I went to look in the mirror to show her how you could see his feet. When we looked, you really could see his feet (very obvious feet outlines....and hands)! Then I noticed that if I stood at the right angle under the red light (?) you could actually see into my stomach and see the whole baby. I could see that he was playing with a doll I had put in there for him to play with (don't ask me how I did that). I thought it was sweet that he liked it...then I noticed he was pulling the pacifier out of the dolls mouth and trying to suck on it. This worried me since it was too small and a choking hazard. So I reached in (not up my you know what, but just in through my stomach somehow...took out the baby and took the pacifier from him. But then when I tried to put him back in there was no way he was going to fit back in the hole, which was rapidly shrinking. So then I told Eden she would have to drive me to the hospital. She didn't like this idea since she didn't know how to drive. It took a long time to gather all my stuff and when we got outside her mom and sister were there and said they'd drive us. They started driving before I got the carseat all buckled in, much less myself, which really annoyed me. Then when we got to the hospital, they wouldn't listen to me when I told them where maternity was and we ended up wandering through the halls looking for it. No one offered to carry anything so I was lugging this huge baby in the carrier (he was HUGE, at least 20 lbs, with blond hair and really close set blue eyes...and everyone kept calling him Eric....I later realized that I think he was supposed to be the Aaron baby from Lost that is way too big for a supposed two month old)....anyway so I was lugging the baby and my bags and my back hurt and no one was helping me. We finally found maternity and I was like; I just had this baby like 40 minutes ago (plunking him on the counter) what am I supposed to do? They were all amazed...especially when I said how he just came out...no contractions, no pushing, no viscera...at this point I was sure something was wrong since that's not how you have babies....and he was fully clothed and huge....and not crying...and didn't look at all like me or Patrick or a newborn. Then I woke up. I decided that him 'just coming out' was not a good idea and I was not comfortable having the baby by myself....without medical personnel assuring me everything was okay. I also hope he's not ginormous with blond hair and close set eyes....and I hope his name isn't Eric, 'cuz I don't like that name. Okay that's all.

Book Meme

I stole this from my sister, who stole it from someone else.
Here are the rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book ( of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.


Book: "Heroic Armor of the Italian Rennaissance: Fillipo Negrolli and his Contemporaries"
Metropolitan Museum of Art


"It appears instead to have been inspired by a popular form of armor worn since the late fourteenth century throughout the Islamic world, notably in Iran, Turkey, and the Mamluk kingdom in Syria and Egypt. The torso defense was fashioned as a short-sleeved jacket opening down the front and constructed of vertical rows of lamellae (small plates) connected by mail, a type of armor that was fairly lightweight, well ventilated, and flexible and that required less time and skill in the forging of the small lames than European armors constructed of large, anatomically shaped plates. Closely related to these Islamic examples is the Russian bekhter, another close-fitting mail-and-plate armor in which the plates are smaller, more numerous, and more compact, with the closing at the sides rather than down the front."

Can you believe that was only three sentences? Crazy huh. If you haven't guessed our computer is over by all of Patricks work stuff, so his are the closest books. I'm not going to tag anyone either, but if you want to do this feel free. :)

Also: 39 weeks, 1 day and no sign of baby yet. Isabelle says he'll come tomorrow, but my body isn't giving any indication if that's the case. I'm thinking he's going to be late like she was so we still have two weeks...which sucks. Oh well.

The End is in Sight!!

First of all, let me just say thanks to those of you who voted on the name poll...and to those of you who haven't let me say; "There's still time!"
Now on to better news. I'm 38 wks today and when I went to the doctor for my checkup she said that my inner cervix was dilated to a 2 and the outer was at a fingertip (ie 1). I have never heard of the cervix referred to as an inner vs. an outer. Anyone out there have a clue what that means? I mean I'm assuming it means the front of the 'tunnel' is a one and the back is a 2...but if that's true, then how did she get past the one to check the 2? Anyway, so any insight you moms of many have would be nice. Last pregnancy there was not a thing going on down there at 38 wks. At 40 wks the doctor said I was 'maybe' a fingertip dilated. When I went into the hospital for the first time (at 40 wks 6 days) and was sent home I was dilated to a 2. The next afternoon when I saw the doctor I was a 3 and that evening when I went in for real it was at 5. So maybe this means I'll have the baby soon? I hope so....well relatively speaking anyway.
Patrick's good friend in Louisianna is getting re-baptized this Saturday and has asked Patrick to be the one to perform the honors. He agreed and is planning to drive down there (possibly with Isabelle) Friday night, baptize him Saturday and then drive home Sunday morning. It's only a five hour drive, so if I do go into labor, chances are good I won't have had the baby before he gets home...unless I go super duper fast or something. But it's a little worrying just the same. I also have my baby shower this Saturday morning and there were a lot of last minute preparations and stress that people have gone through to make it happen so I'd feel bad if I missed it. So the soonest the baby can come is Sunday night. (You still good to watch Isabelle Tammy?) He can also come anytime after Sunday, but preferably sometime next week, not the following. Okay that's it for the update. :)

Name Poll - Please Respond!

Okay so I only have three weeks before this baby is due (I'm hoping it will come in two) and we're still no closer to choosing a name. So I was wondering if you could all answer this question along with your reasons if any...and tell your friends so they'll answer too! Which name do you like better and why:

1) James Patrick Thaden


2) William Patrick Thaden


I like both of them and can think of good and bad reasons to use either one, but what do you think? Inquiring minds want to know!

Which Jane Austen Heroine are you?

I stole this from my sisters blog. I haven't read much Austen, so I don't really know anything about this person...

Take the Quiz here!

"You are Marianne Dashwood of Sense & Sensibility! You are impulsive, romantic, impatient, and perhaps a bit too brutally honest. You enjoy romantic poetry and novels, and play the pianoforte beautifully. To boot, your singing voice is captivating. You feel deeply, and love passionately."

Hmm...

Video?

I've heard that the video links we send people sometimes don't open or take a really long time. So I thought I'd see if blogger would somehow load them faster. If it doesn't or if this really slows down your computer, let me know. I know some blogs that I've been to with videos as an entry really make my computer sluggish until their site is totally loaded...which takes about 3-4 times the normal amount of time. So if it does that, let me know and I"ll take it down. :) But if it works better than I'll upload more.

It just keeps getting bigger...

So I know I suck at updating...sorry. I just never feel like I have anything to contribute. We went to Utah for Christmas, it was fun, but my sister blogged about it so I didn't think I had much to add. Isabelle was very sick, but got everyone else even more sick after we left...we're talking doctors, ER, unable to breathe, etc... It made me glad she seems to have inherited Patrick's strong constitution and doesn't get too sick over anything. In my head I was looking forward to our trip to Utah followed by having the baby. Unfortunately it doesn't quite work like that and I still have at least three weeks left, assuming he comes on time and not a week late like Isabelle. I have been way more uncomfortable with this pregnancy (backaches, sideaches, pulled leg muscles which refuse to heal, contractions if I walk for more then two minutes, gigantor stomach, etc..) not to mention I have to chase Isabelle around this time. So rather than blog about how much pregnancy sucks, I've abstained and saved you all the constant rant. Anyway, so I still have three weeks and it seems like forever. I keep thinking I should do stuff to prepare, like get out the cradle and such, but then it seems silly to get it out and have it sit empty for weeks while Isabelle claims it as her toy before the baby gets here. I mean honestly I could get it out at the first signs of labor and still have time to sit around before the baby came. I figured out last night that from my first real contraction (ie lasted 20+ seconds, was followed by more at regular intervals) to delivery, I was in labor with Isabelle for 58.5 hours. I read that second babies are much faster, coming in as much as half the time. That's great, but it still means I probably have at least 29 hrs of labor to look forward to. So I could totally wait to get my hospital bag together, get the cradle out etc... I probably won't, just in case it only lasts 30 minutes or something insane like that, but I could.

Isabelle will be two years old on Sunday. That's crazy that she's so big already. I'll probably post some birthday stuff after this weekend. Until then here are some pictures of my ever expanding midsection. :)
12 wks

16 wks

20 wks

24 wks

28 wks

32wks

36wks



Okay I know some of you are shaking your heads and saying...she's not THAT big, I don't know what her problem is. Well I feel like I'm THAT big, so I think that counts...and I'm already 23lbs heavier then I was when I delivered Isabelle so that says something...maybe that I like chocolate too much...hmmm. Anyway, it's very depressing. I don't know whether to hope for a 10 lb baby like Christine or to dread pushing out something that big. Given our family history I doubt it will be that big...I was 7lbs 8oz and Patrick was just over 9lbs, but a month overdue. Isabelle was 8lbs 1oz, so I figure this one will be about that. Okay that's all. :)

Which Harry Potter Character are YOU?

Harry Potter Personality Quiz by Pirate Monkeys Inc.

Yep, I was an INTJ the last time I took this kind of test too. Hmmm...me and Snape? I can live with that. :)

Twilight and Vampires

After hearing my sisters-in-law and various other mormon sources rave about the "Twilight" series by Stehenie Meyer I decided to see what all of the fuss was about and bought the first book in the series last Saturday. Just like Christine, I then had to run to the store on Monday to purchase the other two books in the series. I just finished the third (after a couple of 3am nights up reading) and I'm glad for the experience. I was reluctant to read these books at first since all of the excerpts available on Amazon made them seem very juvenile.

SPOILER WARNING

If you do not want to spoil the plot of these books stop reading this post right now and suffice it to say that I enjoyed them and they're worth reading....you can scroll to the bottom for a list of other vampire-themed books/series that I would recommend if you're interested.
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Okay...as I was saying they seemed very juvenile. The protagonist, Bella, is in highschool. Now this isn't a deal breaker in and of itself as I really really like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and she was in highscool for the first three seasons in that show. My concern was that the vampires were also in highschool. Now vampire lore varies depending on the author and I had read books in which, while you can make someone a vampire through biting and other methods, some vampires are born that way. They are born as infants with superhuman strength/speed/ etc...and a craving for blood. They continue to age until they are ready to become a full vampire and "die". After this they live solely on blood (before they ate food and stuff) have even greater super strength etc, and can no longer go out in the sun. So I was concerned that the 17 year old vampire love interest was actually only 17 years old. This made the books seem incredibly less interesting to me, age-ist that I am. However, rest assured that though Edward and his "siblings" attend highscool, they are not actually teenagers (ie, he became a vamp in 1918) and have a good reason for going to highschool when they don't technically have to. Also while the first half of the first book is greatly concerned with silly things like science, calculus, the lunch room and dances, the rest of the book (and series) does not dwell on these issues at all.

One issue I had with the books was the author making the vampires all so young. I know, I know, it's supposed to be a Young Adult book, but you could have made them in their mid-twenties or at least looking like they were in their mid-twenties or so (you know if the issue was people died younger back then...they also seemed to age faster as I recall...30 looked like 50 in some places). I didn't like how Bella had only been with Edward a few days before she suddenly wants to be a vampire too. I realize that the issue is that Edward looks so young and she didn't want to look like his mom by the time she turned, which is why I think it was dumb to make him so young, but still! You'd think she'd give it a little more thought...no more of her favorite foods for one thing...that would be hard to give up. On Buffy, Angel could pass for anything from 22-36 if he wanted. So if she wanted to join him in the ranks of the undead (which wouldn't happen in Buffy-land since vamps there are inherently evil) she would have ten plus years to decide and to live her life without worrying about looking too old. I also didn't like how Bella doesn't seem to see the need for college. So let's say he makes you a vamp after graduation...then what? You'll just go "be a vampire" for the next century? Don't you think his multiple degrees and your lack of knowledge would get on your nerves after awhile? This is like people I knew in highschool that just wanted to get married...and that was why they went to college at all. Then once they snagged a husband they dropped out. Yeah, so you're married, but what are you going to do now? Sit around "being married?" The kids will only occupy your time for so many years and then what? Get a hobby? I don't know, I guess I have strong opinions about college. Okay, moving on.


What I find absolutely hilarious is the Mormon following that these books have. There was even an article about them in Meridian magazine today. This is greatly due to the fact (I'm assuming) that the author is LDS and attended BYU. This also had me concerned about reading the books as I've met several mormons who have very strong opinions about this genre of literature and I wasn't sure how the author would handle the whole blood/killing/living forever/ soul v. no soul issues that are inherent when dealing with vampires. It's been my experience that when an author is mormon members of the church assume that the book will then of course be up to church standards in dress, language, sexuality, etc. So I was very interested to see exactly what kind of vampire series this would turn out to be were that the case here. Now I'm not saying that it isn't...the main characters never have sex or dress overly provocative (that they said anyway) and I think there were maybe two or three swear words in the entire series, which was pretty remarkable for books these days...but it's not that different from many, many other vampire books I've read.

The whole werewolf/vampire/human love triangle thing is explored in the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter (by Laurell K. Hamilton) series (and many others I'm sure). Anita does not have sex with her vamp/wolf boyfriend(s) and must choose between them. However this only lasts for the first six books...but after that the sex isn't too explicit and she only has sex with whoever she has decided on at the time (it changes later)...but by books ten/eleven the series has completely degenerated into something closer to porn literature loosely held together by a very thin plot...so my recommendation is to stop after six if you don't like the sex, and after ten if you actually want to read an entertaining, non porno story. (I went through eleven, bought twelve and have never made it past the first 40 pages though I've had it for years...I think there are 14-15 books in the series now).

The whole non-human blood drinking thing, the soul v. no soul, idea of a vampire counsel, "imprinting/soulmates", mind reading, "special abilities", etc...is also explored in many other books I've read. So really the only unique aspect of this series is the way in which it has led normally vampire resistant mormons into the growing culture of "vampire chic lit." I have heard of ward members passing the books between each other, holding twilight themed parties, and waxing rhapsodic about the intrigue, mystery and romance these books hold. Again...I liked them. I bought the series, I would probably read them again. However as a 13+ year fan of the genre I say if you're looking for something new and uniquely mormon, look elsewhere. If you like this type of book, then this is a good series to explore. There are some plot holes that the author has yet to fill, but she is still writing (next book released in Fall 2008) and will hopefully answer these questions in subsequent books.

I was going to write a list of vamp books along with a short synopsis of how they differ from the Twilight series, but I'll try to keep it short. So here is a list of vamp books I like and/or would recommend. I'll try to post mormon-type warnings if you are interested in other books like Twilight etc.. but are leary of the genre. Okay so here they are:

"Women of the Otherwold" series by Kelley Armstrong: Not necessarily 'vampire' books, but do have vampires and werewolves and such. Some sex and strong language, but very very low key...(no incredibly graphic, goes on for pages sex scenes) I don't remember exessive bad language either. One of the characters is a witch, so if you are offended by paganism, then maybe skip those parts.

Undead and Unemployed(wed,appreciated, etc...) series by Mary Janice Davidson: These are a very light hearted series about a ditzy blond who becomes a vampire on her 30th birthday and finds she's immune to the things that normally hurt other vamps; holy water, sun, etc.. They're funny but do have explicit sex. I don't remember the language being that bad though I'm not sure the average mormon would appreciate these.

Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice: I read these when I was 14 and very into vampires and death and such. They seemed prolific to me and any serious vampire fan should probably read at least the first three. However, that said I have never been able to re-read these. Rice's version of God/ the universe/etc...is very different then mine and I found it a little harder to get through as I got older. However I don't remember any bad language (or very little at least) or explicit sex in the first three books. However I later heard a theory that all of Rices' vamps are bisexual, but I did not get this vibe while I was reading the series.

Blood (debt, pact, lines, etc..) series by Tanya Huff. The protagonist in this series is a human P.I. that discovers vampires exist on a case she's working. She soon has a whole love triangle thing going between Henry Fitzroy (a vamp, the bastard son of Henry VIII (?) who writes romance novels for a living) and her former partner (I think), human investigator Mike Cellucci. I enjoyed these books and don't remember any explicit sex...more the type to fade into the darkness and then the next day get out of bed together then describe the act sex. I think they've actually made this into a tv show on Lifetime, but we don't get that channel.

Kitty Norville series by Carrie Vaughn. Protagonist is a werewolf, but there are vamps in here. Very little, if any, sex that I remember. Some language...but not too much.

Urban Shaman series by C.E. Murphy: These aren't really vampire books, but have the same feel as some of the other series I've listed. The protagonist discovers that she is a shaman and has to go save the world and such.

The Hollows series by Kim Harrison: Protagonist is a witch, but her BF is a vamp. It's a world in which fairytale creatures have come out after half of the human population was wiped out by a supervirus in the 50's. Otherwise it's not a fantasy world or anything. Some sex, violence, language...I think maybe the sex would be the most worrisome thing, but she only sleeps with her boyfriend...and I think they only describe it once in the five books I've read, which is pretty good.

Laws of the Blood by Susan Sizemore...not to be confused with her vamp romance series which I haven't read. Again little to no sex, some language and violence. Protagonist changes from book to book, but all in the same world.

Diana Tregarde series by Mercedes Lackey: there's a vamp in the first book, not so much the other two, but still good. I don't remember any sex, but I think there was some language.

Sookie Stackhouse series by Charlaine Harris: I really enjoyed these books, has vamps, weres, telepaths, etc.. But there is sex and language in these...however they are not the main plot, but may be too much for some. I think they're making this into a series on HBO.

Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series by Laurell K. Hamilton: Like I said above, these are good to a point. No sex until the sixth book, but lots of language. Wouldn't recommend at all past book ten.

Garnet Lacey books by Tate Hallaway: Protagonist is a witch, vampire boyfriend. Some sex/language, but okay.

Mercy Thompson series by Patricia Biggs: Protagonist is a 'skinwalker' (ie changes into a coyote) raised by werewolves has some vamp friends. No sex, some language. These are very good.

Sunshine by Robin McKinley: Protagonist is a human with 'talent.' Kind of falls for a vampire...kind of. No sex or language that I remember. This is a stand alone book as far as I know, but the author could totally make a series out of it if she wanted to.

Okay so that was like the longest post ever, but I thought I'd let the mormon twilight fans know of these other series. Sorry if you got bored halfway through and had to stop. ;)

PS: Christine; you were Jane and Brian was Jacob at the party am I right?

For Our Anniversary....

This one is all about Patrick (stolen from his sisters blogs).

What is his name? Patrick Russell Thaden

How long have you been together? Let's see from first date on March 6, 2003 to now....four years, seven months, and eleven days. Four years of which married.

How long did you date? Four months and ten days before he proposed and then an almost exactly three month engagement. (July 16th-Oct. 17th)

How old is he? 31...but he'll be 32 in January...he's old, poor guy. ;)

Who eats more? At a given mealtime I'd say he does, but over the course of a day I do as I'm home with the food and he's not.

Who said I love you first? He did. I was about to go in and confront my psycho roommates after telling them that I was moving out and he told me not to worry about them because he "thought he was falling in love with me." This made my sardonic brain go,'you THINK? what's that supposed to mean?' especially since he said it in a sing song, shy voice. But I didn't say that out loud....I think I just kissed him or something. I didn't say I love you back for a couple of days because I didn't want him to think I just said it because he did. But I distinctly remember looking at him and thinking "I love you" in April....though he didn't say it until June 16th.

Who is taller? He is by barely two inches....unless he's in boots and I'm barefoot, then it's like 4 which is fun. ;)

Who sings better? I'd say me only because I can actually carry a tune while the song is not playing. He can sing pretty well if it's a song he knows and it's playing at the time, but he would never sing alone...believe me I've tried to make him.

Who is smarter? When it comes to technical and business stuff...and "real world" type stuff he is. But when it comes to writing papers and jumping through hoops to get A's I am.

Who does the laundry? I do. We used to just do it whenever, but now that I'm home all the time this made me feel bad since he ALWAYS needs clothes before I do, so now I do it every Monday.

Who does the dishes? During the day I do, but Patrick tends to do the dinner dishes.

Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? From the laying in bed perspective I do.

Who pays the bills? I do. If they were left to Patrick they'd only get paid when the companies started calling and threatening to shut off or cancel our stuff.

Who mows the lawn? Patrick does...he's worried that since I'm so allergic to everything, grass included, I'll break out in a rash from the flying debris. Which is probably true. ;)

Who cooks dinner? I think I'm slightly more likely to cook dinner than Patrick, especially lately, but it's been a toss up in the past.

Who drives when you're together? He does. I've driven a couple of times when I'm dropping him off somewhere, but that's it. Which is funny because he ALWAYS says when we go on vacation that he's going to have me help drive because it's easier to switch off. This has never happened.

Who is more stubborn? I think it depends on the situation, but generally I'd say me. I'm unreasonably stubborn at times.

Who is the first to admit they are wrong? Patrick. I tend to go to a place in my head where I hold whole conversations about the issue, but never voice them....making myself more upset. Patrick is always the one to give in first and talk things out, including admitting when he was wrong.

Who kissed who first? Patrick kissed me first. I would never kiss a boy first, I would always assume that if he hasn't shown any inclination to kissing me then he wouldn't welcome me kissing him. But after Patrick kissed me first, the door was open and I kissed him just as often as he kissed me. ;)

Who asked who out? Patrick asked me out to dinner and the museum....supposedly to ensure I wasn't crazy before we went on our road trip to New Orleans. I would never ask a boy out first....see reasons above.

Who proposed? Patrick at a restaurant in Flower Mound. He said he wasn't planning to do it there, but the waiter knew he was going to ask and kept walking by looking at my hand, so he felt pressured. Consequently there was no build up, no flowery speech, no getting down on one knee....he just said; "So, I have a question...." and when I looked he had the ring out (in his hand, not the box) "will you marry me?" Later when I explained what I wanted, he proposed many, many more times. My favorite being in the ruins of a castle in Germany in the rain. He said that's the proposal he would have liked to have given. It was very nice...

Who is more sensitive? In general I'd say me, but when it comes to hurting each others feelings it's a toss up.

Who has more friends? Hmm...depends on how you classify friends. If it's people they've known and been in touch with for years, then him. People you actually hang out with and do stuff, me. People you interact with on a daily basis, him.

Who has more siblings? Him. He as six sisters (total of seven kids). I have one sister and three brothers (total of five).

Who wears the pants in the family? I'd say we're pretty equal. Although I generally acknowledge that he has final say in many big things. This is comforting to me to have a big strong manly type as head of the household since my mom was in charge at ours growing up. I hate being in charge....although I'm sure Patrick would say different.


Okay that's it. Maybe more people will comment on this than they did on the food quiz. *hint hint* :)

Food Quiz

My sister-in-law Heidi tagged me to do this food quiz. The Thadens seem to have an easy time of it, but I really had to stretch to think of some of these. :)

1) How do you like your eggs?
Hmm....I don't really like eggs...they tend to make me nauseous. But when I do have them I guess it's scrambled with ketchup on top.

2)How do you take your coffee/tea?
Don't drink coffee or tea. I hate walking down that aisle at the grocery store too, 'cuz I think it stinks.

3) Favorite breakfast foods? Like the eggs in #1, most breakfast foods tend to make me nauseous, including sausage, eggs, bacon, hot chocolate, ham, oatmeal, etc... I do like cold cereal though...and pancakes sometimes.

4) Peanut Butter: Crunchy or Creamy? It was crunchy for several years, but the last year or two I've been wanting creamy...probably an overload of crunchy or something.

5) What kind of dressing do you like on your salad? Depends on the day. Mostly I like Ranch, Thousand Island or French.....although I like Ceasar on Ceasar salad.

6) Coke or Pepsi? Yuck! I HATE cola!!! (and I think they both taste the same)

7) You're feeling lazy, what do you make? For a snack or dinner? For dinner I'd make pasta, it's really easy, especially when you buy the sauce in a bottle like we do.

8) You're feeling REALLY lazy, what pizza do you order? Chicken and pineapple...with mushrooms and tomatoes if we're splurging.

9) You feel like cooking, what do you make? Hmmm...I guess it would depend on what kind of food I was in the mood for. Maybe homemade chicken pot pie, that's really good....or lasagna, that's good too. I'm way more likely to bake something though....like brownies, apple/peach crisp, or pies.

10) Do any food bring back good memories? Yes, my mom's candy cane shaped bread with crushed candy cane frosting make me think of Christmas at home. Turkey and stuffing = Thanksgiving, Candy corn = Halloween, Pumpkin pie = Home, White chocolate raspberry cheesecake - dates with Patrick back when we ordered dessert. My dad's bbq pork ribs with fried potatoes with bacon makes me think of fall evenings at home around the dinner table.

11) Do any foods bring back bad memories? Lemon bars- remind me of when I bit into an eggshell in one. Special K with strawberries - getting sick the day before I had Isabelle and throwing up a whole bowl full a few minutes after I ate it. I can't think of anything else...I have a tendency to block bad memories, which makes them hard to recall if the food or whatever isn't actually there.

12) Do any foods remind you of someone? Umm..yes? Let's see...uh...corned beef and cabbage reminds me of my friend Eden as I had that at her house once. She was shocked that I was Irish and had never had it before (they eat it every St. Patrick's day). Those candy cane bread things make me think of my mom. Chicken florentine makes me think of Patrick as he orders that every single time we go to Bari's.

13) Is there any food you refuse to eat? I agree with Heidi and Christine about the faces thing....I don't like to be able to identify the animal I'm eating just by looking at it. I had fried calamari once....it was whole mini squid just fried. They tasted okay, but I kept gagging 'cuz I was ripping apart it's body with my teeth....same thing with shrimp....excluding small breaded 'popcorn' shrimp. Though I won't "refuse" to eat it, I really, really don't like oatmeal as it looks and feels like a big bowl of mucus.

14) What was your favorite food as a child? My mom's homemade pizza....I hated store/restaurant pizza, but loved hers.

15) Is there any food you hated as a child, but like now? Cheesecake. I don't know how I ever disliked that....and the pizza thing, I'll eat most any pizza now.

16) Is there a food you liked as a child, but hate now? Lemon bars, see #11.

17) Favorite fruit and vegetable? Hmm....grapes, strawberries, pineapple, oranges, bananas, corn, broccoli, yellow squash, green beans, spinach, tomatoes.

18) Favorite junk food? Depends on the day....brownies, ice cream, coffee cake, almond joys, cheesecake....

19) Favorite in between meal snack? Popsicles, made with real juice, cheese and crackers, grapes, pancakes with chocolate chips and marshmallows on top, yogurt (yoplait strawberry).

20) Do you have any wierd food habits? Hmm...I don't think so...if anyone has noticed any, feel free to tell me.

21) You're on a diet, what do you fill up on? Carrot sticks and applesauce....and special k cereal bars.

22) You're off your diet, now what would you eat? Umm...real food? Sandwiches, taquitos, cereal, crackers, etc...

23) How spicy to you order your Indian/Thai? Not intentionally, but I notice most of the stuff I order from these menus have the spicy sign next to them....whatever that means.

24) Can I get you a drink? Water, lemonade or cranapple please.

25) Favorite dessert? Brownies, cheesecake, ice cream.


Okay...that seemed to go on forever....I guess I'm not as intimately aquainted with food as some of the Thadens, but that's okay. Now I tag Tearese and Margie.

21 wks and counting...

I'm sure those of you who read my blog already know this, but we just found out we're having a boy!

I was sure it was a girl, so we had a bunch of girl names ready. Now I'm not sure what we'll name it. Right now we like William or James (middle name Patrick is a given), but I've been known to change my mind. Any suggestions from the peanut gallery?

Tomorrow (Oct 3rd) I'll be 21 weeks along. For those of you keeping track of my expanding waistline, here's a new picture:

People at church have finally started asking, and the RS is putting me in the newsletter for this month so soon everyone will know. I'm fine with that. I think it's totally obvious, but people that find out are shocked. They say things like; "But you're so little!! There's no way you could be that far along!" I don't know if they're serious or just being nice because I am way bigger than I was last time at this point. I'm also much more uncomfortable than I was last time. I don't remember feeling huge and awkward until the last trimester last time but I already feel gargantuan. I'm not sure if that's a boy/girl thing or a second pregnancy thing. I'm thinking the latter.

The state of my pregancy wardrobe is sad. I have two t-shirts, and two sweater type shirts that are too hot to wear yet. I have plenty of pants and skirts, but the shirts are seriously lacking. I have asked a few people where they bought their cute pregnancy clothes and have lots of suggestions that I'm ready to use as soon as we have money. Unfortunately this probably won't be until after I've had the baby. Luckily my mom took pity on me and bought be a shirt or two (I think...they're in the mail). Hopefully they fit and aren't too off from my own taste. But even if they aren't anything I'd buy, I'll still wear them 'cuz it's better than nothing.

The solo thing I did went well, except for the fact that my guitar was out of tune (oops!). Luckily the way the mic's were set up it didn't pick up my guitar as much as it should have so maybe no one noticed?

What else...hmm...I went through all of my baby clothes today in search of non gender specific clothes for the new baby. I was happily surprised to find that I had alot more boyish clothes than I thought I did. I got alot from Patrick's sister Tammy that were yellow/green that I made Isabelle wear, but used to belong to Tammy's boys. They're still in mostly good condition, so I'm not so worried about not having any boy things for the baby. I also found like 6 bags worth of stuff for Jenny that I probably wouldn't have kept even if the baby was a girl, but it's nice to share. I know I really appreciated it when we got so many clothes donations from people. Now we just need new crib stuff...the bumper, skirt, and sheets we have are all girly with flowers and such. Again, hopefully we'll have money sometime before the baby comes to get some new boyish stuff. Okay, I think that's a long enough post.

Oh, Tearese/Christine; how do you get the map thing to stay on your page? Mine just came up as a post.

KieraAnne

Create your own visitor map!

5 Things Meme

Okay so my sister Tearese tagged me with this and I really like these sorts of things so here we go.

5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
1. Getting my hair layered for the first time. This has since become my staple hair cut that I always revert to when trying new things doesn't work out.
2. Alternately hoping/dreading that my friend David would ask me out. He was the first male friend I had and I fluctuated between just liking him and "liking" him.
3. I was in my Junior year at Cedar High School...the first year following the split with the newly built Canyon View High School.
4. Playing first clarinet in the Symphonic Band.
5. Looking into and touring various college campuses in anticipation of my graduation the following year.


5 things on my to-do list today:
1. Laundry - this is the only household chore I do consistently every week.
2. Allergy shots - another weekly task that happens to fall on Monday.
3. Clean the living room - this I only do sometimes, but my feet have started crunching things into the carpet so I decided it's probably time to vacuum.
4. Go walking with Margie and Josh
5. Put gas in the car.


5 snacks I enjoy:
1. Strawberry Cheesecake - I guess that's more of a dessert then a snack, but if we have it I'll sure snack on it!
2. Crackers and Cheese - and grapes/apples if we have them....or bread if there's no crackers...
3. Brownies
4. Toast with raspberry jam
5. Strawberry yogurt - Yoplait is the best


5 songs I know the lyrics to:
1. Most any U2 song
2. American Pie - Don McLean
3. Most Disney movie songs
4. Most Oldies because my dad worked at an oldies station and made tapes for our vacations.
5. Sweet Child of Mine - Guns 'n Roses


5 things I would do if I were a Millionaire:
1. Pay off all of our debt
2. Buy my mom a house
3. Invest/hire someone to help me know what to invest in so we'd never have to work again.
4. Buy a new house or 'fix'(ie. completely rebuild from the ground up) ours
5. Buy Patrick a new shop


5 Bad Habits:
1. Not spending enough time playing with my child(ren)
2. Not cleaning the house on a regular basis
3. Spending money on frivolous things like books or ice cream when we should be paying our bills.
4. Taking naps when Isabelle does instead of getting things done.
5. Complaining about our big ward


5 things I'd never wear again:
1. Off the shoulder sweatshirts...for one thing they'd look pretty funny with my big 'ol mormon underwear.
2. Short skirts - see above
3. Those little hoops to tie up one corner of a long t-shirt into a knot.
4. Midriff baring shirts - even w/o my underwear issue, I don't think anyone really wants to see my stretch marks.
5. Bright pink boots with black fur trim.


5 Favorite Toys:
1. Blair, my stuffed dragon
2. My "Birthday Bear" (carebear) I got when I was four.
3. My E.T. doll
4. My stuffed dog named "Whitepaw" my dad got me for my birthday one year.
5. The purple "pound puppy" my mom made me.


Okay I guess that's it. I'm tagging Margie, Christine, and Emily if they want to do this....and assuming they're still reading my blog to know they've been tagged. ;)

Pregnancy, church, babies, etc...

That is a very descriptive and eye catching title don't you think? Yeah me neither. I just thought I should update before I lose the interest of all of my hoardes of new readers. ;) Let's see...pregnancy: Yesterday we went to my doctors appt. While we were waiting to see her, which seems to take forever now that they're at their new and improved office building, Isabelle was playing with a cute chubby baby. He was 11 months old and one of the fatest babies I've seen...not grotesque or anything just really, really chunky...or what my sister and I would call a 'chubalub'. He was cute. Anyway Isabelle kept going over and saying hi to him. His family (both parents were there) finally moved over closer to us...whether to be closer to Isabelle or the door I don't know. Anyway, they were very nice to let Isabelle play with the babies toys and such. After the mom went in to her appt, she left the dad with what looked like a bottle of straight apple juice for their kid (maybe why he's so big?). The baby soon lost interest and was playing with magazines. Here's the point of the story; Isabelle goes over to the baby and puts his pacifier in his mouth. She's delighted that he seems to like this and proceeds to take it out and put it back into his mouth repeatedly. (I tried to stop her from touching the sucking part, but the dad said it was okay so I left her alone) After doing this for a bit, she noticed the abandoned juice bottle over by their chairs. She went and got it and then proceeded to feed the baby. It was so funny 'cuz the baby was really enjoying it. She was so proud of herself. The dad asked me if she had any little brothers or sisters and I said no, apparently she just knows what to do. So that was cute. Other pregnancy things....
I'm still pregnant, so that's good. ;) I'm about a month bigger than I was at this point last time. I've started wearing my pregnancy clothes to church, which to me is an open invitation to come up to me and ask if I'm pregnant. No one has. This makes me a little annoyed after trying so hard to hide it forever and now that I'm finally open and announcing it to the world as it were, no one says anything. I got myself all worked up about it until I decided that maybe since I'm not really close to anyone in the ward no one wants to just come up and ask me on the off chance that I'm just fat. So I guess that's okay...but I came out and told a few church ladies I saw this week, so maybe they'll spread the word. Last time I didn't have to tell anyone they just asked, but I guess I knew those people better as I had callings with them. I've been in this ward for 9 months now and still haven't had a calling...not that I'm complaining too much....if I did I'm sure they'd put me in nursery or cub scouts, the two callings I DO NOT want to do. But without one I don't really talk to anyone but my VT companion and the sisters we see...and I've already posted about that.
Speaking of church, our ward is too big. They split the wards at the beginning of this year, so you'd think that all of the new wards would be in nice manageable sizes. Nope. Our ward fills up half the gym every single week. Most of the ward is from Sanger and since they have to drive 15 + minutes to get to church they all get there very early. So those of us who live in town and are used to coming ten minutes before the meeting starts (or leaving our house then anyway) never get a seat. Although after actually getting a bench once or twice I've decided it's better in the back with the soft folding chairs as they try to cram as many people as they possibly can onto the pews. If we had a few more kids we could probably stake out a whole side row for ourselves, but since we've just the one the self-appointed ushers think they can squish 4-5 more people onto the bench with us. I was also annoyed when we first came to this ward as relief society was really really full....enrichment (the one I went to) had over 60 sisters there...just from our ward. Anyway I had since gotten over this, but then they moved us into the chapel instead of the RS room...to accomodate all of us I'm sure. I don't like this at all. First of all I hate being in the same room for all three hours, but more I hate not being 'forced' to mingle with the other sisters as you find a seat, wait for the door to open and make small talk with whoever is next to you. In the chapel you get up, move to a different part of the bench and still don't sit by or talk to anyone. (Yes I know I could go and purposely sit by and talk to someone, but I don't want to bother people if they're actually waiting for their friends...or talk to someone that will latch onto me forever after that and be annoying...man I sound like a jerk...anyway...) I'm also annoyed 'cuz the sister teaching next week asked me to play my guitar and sing for her lesson. This in itself is not a big deal, but would be so much easier in the RS room where all I'd need was a chair at the front. In the chapel I need to either move the chalk board so I can sit up by the choir seats where people could see me, or sit in front where none but the first two rows can, I also need a microphone either my own on stand, which I'd then have to arrange and hope it picks up both my voice and the guitar, or the teachers' clip on mic that I'd worry would get too much guitar or get banged into or something...and I don't want to be in charge of all that. In my head I think I counted more problems with singing in the chapel, but I can't think of them now.
What else....we get to find out what the baby is (human or otherwise) in two weeks (oct 1). Isabelle thinks we'll have a girl (probably because she can say girl and not boy), but if you ask her she'd much rather we have a doggy. ;) Okay I was going to write more about clothes and hospitals, but I think I'll save that for next time. :)

Not so disgruntled ramblings....

So I feel really bad about my last post now that more of Patricks sisters have blogs and seem to be reading mine. I'm not really that negative in real life. Like I said, I just tend to blog when I'm in a bad mood and my writing style tends towards depicting more 'extreme' emotions than I'm actually meaning to convey. So that said, I'm now going to try and write a more positive and interesting blog. We'll see how it goes. ;)
As you all know I'm pregnant...about 16.5 weeks now. A lady at church last week asked if I was expecting and I told her that yes I was, but to please not tell anyone for at least another week. This is because our Relief Society prints the names, due dates, and baby gender of all the expectant mothers in the ward. Now personally I really like this feature of the newsletter because I'm very nosy about other peoples reproductive habits, but not social enough to try and befriend these people to ask them about it. So it's nice for me to be able to just peruse the monthly newsletter and see who is expecting. However, as a pregnant person myself, I have made it my goal to go as long as possible without letting people at church know we're expecting and thus see how long I can go before they put me in the newsletter. I know I won't make it past October, but I'm hoping I'll at least miss the cut off for the September issue...thus the waiting one more week before telling anyone. Don't ask me why I do this, I don't really know. I think it might have started with my first pregnancy when we thought it would be funny to see how long we could go with no one noticing. Our ultimate and, quite admitedly, unrealistic goal being we would just show up in church one day with a baby and no one would have noticed I was pregnant...which actually did happen with one girl, but she was really wrapped up in her own newborn at the time and thus oblivious to what was going on around her as there was no mistaking my pregnancy towards the end...but it was still funny...anyway.. So I wanted to go as long as I could with no one noticing and as I had several sizes up of 'normal' clothes left over from my heavier days I thus was able to pull off looking not pregnant for longer than I might have otherwise. I made it until a little after 20 wks before someone (the same lady as this time curiously enough) asked if I was expecting...very hesitantly too, which was nice. When I admitted that I was and told her (and others in the following weeks) how far along I was they were all very impressed that I had made it so far without 'really' showing. I thought it was great fun from that point on to compare myself sizewise to other pregnant women in the ward. Now I know it's not good to compare yourself to others, but growing up I was always one of the bigger girls in any situation so to find myself as one of the smallest was a great novelty that I thoroughly enjoyed. This time around does not appear to be the case. I heard that you 'pop' sooner with your second and subsequent babies, and I suppose weighing ten lbs more starting out than I did last time doesn't help, but I really didn't think I'd get big so soon. Not that I"m huge or anything, but I'm already as big at 16 wks as I was at 22'ish weeks last time. So I guess that's what I get for comparing myself with others. As long as it all comes off after the baby though, I guess it's okay.

We got Isabelle a potty training book the other day. I'm not going to try and start her going until after her birthday and probably not until the baby comes, since I heard children often revert after a new baby, but I thought it would be good to familiarize her with the whole process beforehand so that she's prepared. It's really funny though because the last page of the book has the little girl smiling and pointing to herself with her thumbs saying "I'm so proud of me!" Ever since we read that page Isabelle has been going around the house saying ME! It's really cute. Also the same day (I think) we watched Finding Nemo and I showed Isabelle how to say "Mine! Mine! Mine!" like the seagulls. It's pretty funny, though I'm sure I'll regret it once she realizes what that really means. But until then it's fun to get her going with both of us saying "mine, mine, mine". She thinks it's funny too, so that's good.
I've been really wierd about dinner lately. I'm usually pretty good about making dinner for the family when Patrick comes home and being inventive when our food supply is running short and we can't go to the store just yet. But the past two days I've had a craving for pizza. We don't have the stuff to make pizza or the money to buy it so we've had to have something else for dinner. But the problem is I can't get myself to work up the enthusiasm for anything else. Everything we have sounds nasty to me and not worth the effort. Consequently we've been eating much later then usual as I can't decide on anything and Patrick finally has to just make whatever he wants. He has been nice enough to make me whatever I eventually, and very grudgingly, concede might be edible enough for me to stomach (I don't say it like that, in case you think I'm rude), but I know it annoys him. I feel bad, but still when dinner time rolls around I find myself in the same funk. I really should plan menus for the week or something so that there's no decision to be made...so maybe I'll do that sometime. ;)
We're going to try and go see Pirates of the Carribean 3 tonight at the dollar theater. We're taking Isabelle with us as I'd feel bad leaving her with anyone for three and a half hours during dinner time (for us) and bedtime for their kids. I really wanted to see this movie at the theater for the first time rather than on video. This is because the last one wasn't very good, but the effect of watching it on a big screen with surround sound made it better than it would have been otherwise. So just in case this one is kinda sucky too I wanted to at least get the full effect before judging it.
Okay so that's about it for this post. Hopefully it was a little more uplifting than the last one. If not, then blame my writing style which tends to inadvertantly offend people. :)

Disgruntled ramblings...

So having babies sucks. They cry, they whine, they make a mess, they always want you to hold them, you have to change their diapers, feed them even when they don't want to eat, pay attention to them when you would much rather be doing anything else, etc.., etc..
Isabelle has been frustrating today, if you can't tell. It's not like she was doing anything out of the ordinary...other than being a little more fussy than usual. But I've come to the realization (as I have many times in the past) that having babies sucks. They demand all of your time and attention and they are really freaking annoying. Patrick and I never get to go anywhere or do anything anymore because we can't take Isabelle with us....or taking her makes the event such a big ordeal that it is no longer worth it. We also don't have any money(...and Patrick works until nearly 10pm six nights a week and promptly falls asleep on the couch as soon as we've eaten...) But even if we did, it's not like we can go anywhere. We haven't been on vacation in forever and probably won't for the forseeable future. Patrick is settling in to his new business location and I'm getting more depressed at the prospect of living here FOREVER. I mean don't get me wrong, I like Texas most days, but it's so stinking hot in the summer....and there are no real trees or mountains anywhere. The "beautiful" scenery is mainly pasture land with a light sprinkling of scrubby looking trees. I don't really like being able to see from horizon to horizon...it's ugly. I want some variation. My sister is moving this week from Everett, WA to Logan, UT. Not that I want to live in Utah, but its depressing because all of my family is pretty centrally located there. I have one aunt in California and one in Minneapolis and then us in Texas. Everyone else is within 8 hours of each other. We're 22 hours away from my parents house. My parents also live in a somewhat isolated town that only has one plane that comes in twice a day. As they are the only airline flying into Cedar they can charge whatever they want...and they do. So flying in to visit is most generally not an option...especially now that we'll have to be buying Isabelle her own seat soon. Driving in to visit wasn't so bad, but now with Isabelle it suddenly becomes much more of an ordeal...we have to stop, we have to get a hotel, etc... So that sucks.
Oh yeah so babies....then right when they start to get old enough that you think maybe they'll be okay and actually enjoy it if you left them with someone, boom, out pops another one...and your available funds drop by that much more...it's a seemingly endless cycle...and since we plan on having 4-5 kids I honestly don't see us getting out to do anything for the next several years. I'm stuck at home watching them (when there is a 'them' right now it's just a 'her') bored out of my mind. I can't get a job because any money I made would just go to pay for daycare and having someone else raise my kids. I don't like that idea as there are a bunch of messed up people with screwy ideas about what a child needs...plus then she/they probably wouldn't get the one on one time they need to develop. But it's not like I spend all of my time devoted to playing with my baby and teaching her things. I mostly try to ignore her unless she gets in my way or screams to the point of distraction. Anyway, she's sleeping now, so this is my "free" time. Two hours out of every day...but there's nothing on tv, nothing on the internet, no movie worth watching or book worth reading so I'm left with twiddling my thumbs or taking a nap. Guess which one I choose.